| » Just for laughs |
| Q: What do you cal1 20 Flight Attendants in a basement?
A: A whine cellar.
Q: What is the difference between a F/A and a jet engine?
A: The engine stops whining at the gate.
Q: Why does it take a F/A 5 minutes to open a carton of orange ... |
| Added on : 06-Jun-2010 |
Added by : C Simmons |
Rating : 5/5 (2 votes) |
| » We have the localizer... sort of |
| ATC: N123, have you captured the localizer?
N123: Negative..... but we have it surrounded! ... |
| Added on : 16-Jun-2009 |
Added by : Samuel Rares |
Rating : 4.83/5 (12 votes) |
| » Mmmm runway-kill |
| Tower: Be advised dead animal on runway 36L
A/C: Roger, will advise our catering. ... |
| Added on : 16-Jun-2009 |
Added by : Samuel Rares |
Rating : 4/5 (3 votes) |
| » Birds on the runway - send the firemen |
| Taxiing plane: Tower, be advised there is a flock of birds on the runway near the intersection.
Tower: Roger, we will send out the firetruck.
Taxiing plane: No, they are not on fire, they are just there! ... |
| Added on : 16-Jun-2009 |
Added by : Samuel Rares |
Rating : 4/5 (5 votes) |
| » How to really read a METAR |
| Captain, the METAR is less than 6 inches long, so no problem! ... |
| Added on : 16-Jun-2009 |
Added by : Samuel Rares |
Rating : 3.67/5 (3 votes) |
| » Driving you to Phoenix |
| After pulling back from the gate on a Southwest flight the plane taxied for what seemed like forever, never seeming to get to the runway. Finally a flight attendant comes on the PA and announces ... |
| Added on : 25-Mar-2009 |
Added by : rob |
Rating : 4.59/5 (12 votes) |
| » Helicopter mode?! |
| On Lajes Air Base (Azores, Portugal, a formation of 6 portuguese Air Force FIAT G91 some miles away requested a runway overhead and the ATC (a woman) approved. The lady though that by time they arrive, i\'ll have all the traffic landed but things was not ... |
| Added on : 03-Dec-2008 |
Added by : Fabio Rocha |
Rating : 4.77/5 (22 votes) |
| » Guess the airline this Flight Attendant works for... |
| A guy sitting at an airport bar in Calgary noticed a beautiful woman sitting next to him. He thought to himself, "Wow, she is so gorgeous she must be a flight attendant. But which airline does she work for?" Hoping to gain her attention, he ... |
| Added on : 24-Aug-2008 |
Added by : YVR_Blondie |
Rating : 4.64/5 (68 votes) |
| » Jolly Old St. Nicholas |
| Jolly Old St. Nicholas, I'm from the FAA
I've been told that you have no transponder on your sleigh!
Christmas Eve is coming soon, so listen close to me,
Get your sled transponder rigged, make sure it has Mode C!
When the clock is striking 12 and kids ... |
| Added on : 19-Mar-2008 |
Added by : Jeanie Baker Hubbard |
Rating : 2.63/5 (8 votes) |
| » Southern Comfort |
| An American passenger flight from New York had about 50 miles to go until landing at Atlanta so the Captain called up with "Hello,Atlanta. we'll be with you at about 12:10 approaching from the north and looking for clearance for approach and landing. ... |
| Added on : 18-Aug-2007 |
Added by : Bill Dunn |
Rating : 1.33/5 (27 votes) |